“THE PROCESS IS THE END. FOR IT IS THE PROCESS THAT IS GLORIFYING TO GOD.” --Oswald Chambers

"This life therefore, is not godliness but the process of becoming godly, not health but getting well, not being but becoming, not rest but exercise. We are not now what we shall be, but we are on the way. The process is not yet finished, but it is actively going on. This is not the goal, but it is the right road. At present, everything does not gleam and sparkle, but everything is being cleansed." --Martin Luther

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

JOURNAL NOTES

I’m back. I have been trying to think of what to write so I decided to take some excerpts from my journal over the last 2 weeks and share with you just some of the amazing things God did that I got to be a small part of.
I flew out of Minneapolis at noon on the 3rd of June and got to Lusaka, Zambia (pronounced Zam-bee) about 9 pm Monday. We stayed at a lodge called The Barn. When we got there we got our room assignments and then I just went off by myself and looked up into the night sky and prayed, “Father, here I am standing I the middle of Africa. Now what?” It was almost overwhelming. I began to get choked up. There was so much emotion; I felt I just had to hold it together or just have some time alone and let it go. I turned in not knowing for sure if I’d be able to sleep. I woke up at 2:30 am. I felt like I was getting sick. I had such a heaviness on me, especially on my chest. I started praying about it. I also asked God to tell His people to pray. He did! Then it hit me (call it the Spirit). What I was feeling was not natural; it was supernatural. I rebuked the spirit and commanded it to leave in the name of Jesus. Immediately I felt the weight lift.
6-5-07
Just back from doing evangelism. We did a school in the morning and one in the afternoon. Kids range from elementary through high school. That was quite an experience. I’ve never just walked into a classroom full of students and just start teaching them about Jesus.
6-6-07 1 AM Zambian time
I seem to only be able to sleep a couple of hours at a time. I am restless and nervous-I can see this becoming a reality. It excites me and scares me. I question myself. I have to know that this is God’s desire for me. I pray He will reveal the answer to me but also to many others before I return. I need to go out and walk and talk to my Father.
2 AM
Just got done pacing the parking lot, talking to God and crying. He is right here, along with His angels standing guard but the accuser of the brethren is also here. As I talked with my Father, I told Him I’m willing to give my very life for he cause of Christ. But then I heard a whisper, “But what if it costs you your wife and kids, then what? What if you lose one of them because you came here?” I felt God telling me to ask myself, “What if the Lord takes one of them home when we come here?” I realized I hadn’t completely surrendered them to God. I know that now, I need to. He could take them even now, all of them and there would be nothing I could do. It does not matter where we are. We are all in God’s hands. The question is “Will I/we/you serve Christ no matter what?” The answer to that question has to be YES.
I talked to Pete this morning at breakfast. It seems that he was going through a lot to the same stuff at the same time this morning, many of the same attacks. We had a really good talk about it.
This afternoon we went to another school. It was south of Lusaka about an hour. It was the first time many of these kids had ever seen a white person; they practically smothered us. Almost none of them had a bible in their home; they were so excited to see us because they were told that we would be bringing bibles. After our presentations we gave tracts to everyone and a bible to each teacher and administrator. Most of the team (including me) went out to play futobol (soccer) with the kids. The headmaster asked and Pete stayed behind to teach the administrators and teachers the gospel message and how to evangelize.
6-7-07
Today was about as much ministry as a group of people could do in one day. I am shot! My day started at 6:30 am and we were in bed by 9:15 pm. This afternoon the school we went to was out in the bush. Last night I asked God if it would be possible to harvest some fruit. So before I shared the Gospel with a group of 6th -7th graders, God pointed out a boy to me. I asked some questions; he was the one who answered. So I somewhat tailored my message right to him. I could see he was really listening and thinking. At the end of the message I asked the kids to pray with me. But this time when we were done, I also asked who had prayed to accept Christ for the first time. There were four who raised their hands, and that boy was one of them. I know there have probably been others. I clearly feel like God paired us up today. It was an answered prayer and it was amazing.

1 comment:

Leroy and Kari Huizenga said...

Brian,

We're very excited to see you next week and to hear more about your journey. We continue to pray for you.

Kari and Leroy