After Obedience, comes DEPENDENCE

That was a statement made at our prayer meeting Tuesday night. It really struck both Kelly and I as to that being exactly where we are right now. And frankly it’s not easy. You think obedience was tough, try complete dependence. I’ve learned that we think we depend on God. But really, we don’t. We rely on our own resources our own abilities and connections. The fact is- God provides them- not us! HE is the maker of heaven and earth and to think we can do anything apart from Him is arrogant and foolish. The fact is, most of the time we don’t even realize that we are trying to do it ourselves. That is what has happened to me the last couple of weeks. And I became more and more discouraged with the church (God’s people) and with God Himself. I was so caught up in what was going on that I didn’t see it until I was to the breaking point. God allows us to go there to see our need for total dependence on Him. For me it all came to a head on Thursday night at my men’s Bible study. I really felt like I had been getting beat up lately about going into the mission field. I have had a few people questioning what we are doing (and that is okay, I want people to understand-I want them to ask us questions) but I also have had others that flat out disagree with our approach and tell us that we should be doing it differently (their model for how missions should be done). I was to the point of questioning God’s call. God began to remind me of all of the confirmations that He gave. At the study the facilitator recognized that I was struggling and asked if I would share. I couldn’t, there was so much emotion built up inside that if I opened my mouth I knew I would break down. The analogy that came to mind is that of a soldier. As followers of Christ we are all soldiers and we are in a/many battles whether we acknowledge or recognize it. And there are times when soldiers get beat up and tired and they need a little time to rest and get reenergized to get back into the battle and fight effectively. At the end of the evening he asked the men to gather around me to lay hands on me and pray. The Bible talks about praying in the Spirit. That is what these men did! They did not know what was specifically going on in my life and the battles taking place, yet they prayed specifically to the situations taking place. Sometimes God takes you to that place where you are completely empty just so He can fill you back up; to teach you not only obedience but dependency on Him in ALL things.